Remembering Infertility During the Holidays

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Remembering infertility during the holidays

As the holiday season approaches, my planning side jumps into overdrive. I LOVE to plan and I LOVE to live up the holidays, especially now that I have children. Call it filling the void that was teaching, being addicted to Pinterest, or whatever you like, but I thoroughly enjoy celebrating the holidays with my littles. It’s a time full of anticipation, joy, tradition, and family. However, as much as I enjoy the holidays with my crew in tow, my heart remembers and aches for those still struggling through infertility. It was only three short years ago when we were in those shoes, hoping for a Christmas miracle to take place and expand our family. 

Holidays aren’t easy for a lot of people, but with infertility, you’re silently mourning a void during a holiday that centers around the one thing you’d like to experience most — the birth of a baby. It’s a roller coaster of emotions that I don’t wish upon anyone, especially during the holidays. If you’re struggling with infertility during the holidays, here are a few ideas to hopefully help make this season a little easier this year.

You don’t owe anyone an explanation. 

Holiday gatherings are notorious for prying questions from unsuspecting family members or friends about your procreation or lack thereof. You do NOT have to share your personal information with anyone unless you choose to. Try preparing a few responses ahead of time to make interactions like these less awkward or upsetting. 

It’s ok to say no. 

It can be mentally and physically draining trying to maintain a positive attitude, whether around those who are or are not familiar with your current struggles. Allow yourself a free pass to say no when you just need to take some time for yourself and your own mental health. Everyone needs time to recharge! 

Allow yourself time to be sad.

You are entitled to feel upset about your current situation. It is ok to allow yourself time to grieve that this holiday did not turn out as you’d hoped. If you’re a few minutes late to the party because you needed a minute to collect yourself, I promise it will be ok. 

Find support.

Find a local support group or friends who understand your struggle. I’m most thankful for the relationships my infertility struggle built for me during a hard time. I would not have survived without encouragement from other women who also struggled through infertility. 

Try to stay in the moment.

Most of my sadness came from dwelling too much on what I’d hoped the current holiday would look like. Try to focus on what you have been blessed with this year and create a new memory with your spouse. Don’t be afraid to start a new tradition. It definitely will not fill the void you feel, but it can add some good within the struggle.

Hopefully some of these tips will help you survive the holiday season while struggling with infertility or gave you ideas to support those in your life who may be struggling with it this year.

If you’ve dealt with infertility, what are some of your tips for surviving the holiday season? 

 

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Stacey grew up in Birmingham and being the homebody she is, decided to stay and attend college at Samford University where she earned a degree in elementary education. She always dreamed of being a SAHM, but never imagined she'd be using her classroom management savvy to help raise BGG triplets. She met her husband, Jonathan, at the dear age of five, but it took them 20 more years and lots of different paths to realize they were meant for each other. A major planner at heart, Stacey is learning that some of the best things in life come in the unexpected. She and her husband currently live in Bluff Park and enjoy the unique challenges that their exciting family life brings. When she does get time to herself, Stacey enjoys exercise-especially Zumba, chai lattes, pedicures, a good book, and quality time with friends.