Recently I went through a drastic life change. It was hard, but I knew that it was time to move on. Now it has been months and I’ve had time to reflect on myself and life. The thing was — I was always taking care of someone. This included my family, my friends, my child, and my other 40+ children that are in my classroom. I put so much focus on those things that I lost sight of what I needed. Here are a reminder and some tips on how you can take care of yourself so that you’re the best version of yourself.
Self-Care Tips for Moms
Make time for yourself.
Let’s start with making time for yourself because all the other points are going to fall under this one. Like I mentioned before, I lost sight of what I needed to better those around me — BUT, you can’t better anyone or anything if you’re not reflecting and growing yourself. This step is important and needs to be a priority.
If you don’t have a planner, I highly suggest getting one and penciling in dates that work for “You Time.” When a plan is set, the goal is more likely to be achieved. That is why sometimes this time might be alone time or time with your friends. I don’t know many people that like going out by themselves, but I’ve found some relaxation in getting a meal by myself. I usually use that time to reflect on my life and to set some goals for myself. There are also times that I just mindlessly go on Instagram or Facebook also. This is your time, so it looks different for everybody. Earlier I mentioned getting a meal by yourself. Other things you can do include: working out, getting a coffee, going on a walk, or getting a manicure/pedicure.
Plan girl time.
This one is important! Something I learned from getting married young is that it’s important to have friends — especially girl ones. I’m at the age where the girl friends in my life are at different stages and sometimes it doesn’t match my life, but that’s okay! Surround yourself with a strong group of women that you can lean on when you need some girl time or advice. I didn’t realize how much I needed girl friends until I realized that the only friend I had was my spouse (which is great and all), but I really do think friends outside of your husband is important and allows for you to let loose. Even though we are married and/or mothers doesn’t mean that we aren’t still developing. I remember sitting at church and the pastor mentioned that we need to surround ourselves with friends that lift us up and empower us to be better people. So when you are looking for friends, make sure that they have your best interest at heart and that they are going to help you grow in a positive and beautiful way.
Pursue new hobbies/interests.
This is actually the most exciting one to me! I’ve recently started kickboxing and Ju Jitsu, and it has been something I didn’t know I needed. The stress from my day (school, work, family) is released when I take these classes. It’s also time for myself that I use to become a stronger woman. These classes have shown me how powerful I am, in a physical and mental way. Your hobbies and interests are going to look different than mine, but explore different things (some that are out of your comfort zone) to see what you like and don’t like.
I never liked watching MMA and boxing because I couldn’t watch people beating each other up. Then I realized that my body needed to be challenged more than just going to the gym. My mind needed something more physical and challenging. Ju Jitsu is something that does both things and also has a huge focus on self-defense. I think EVERYBODY, especially women, needs to do Ju Jitsu. There is a huge focus on how you can take on opponents that are larger than you because, sadly, in the real world women can be targeted based on their size. This is something I have chosen to focus on, but there are so many different activities/hobbies out there — go try one!
When we set these goals, we know what we want to accomplish. This could be something small that you do every day (work out for one hour) or something that is more long term (go back to school and get a degree). When you set a goal, it allows for you to think through the process of it and how it can be executed and achieved. Also, when you set your goals, make sure they are realistic and things you can see yourself doing. Make sure to have check points through the process and evaluate yourself. If your goal is to work out more, then set a smaller goal at the beginning and move up to a higher level as you become more comfortable. When you set goals, they are what you decide is best for your mind and body, so you can constantly customize them.
You’ve got this! 2020 was hard for everybody, but 2021 is going to be better. This year don’t focus on becoming a “new you” — rather, focus on becoming a better you. I truly believe that if we are a little “selfish” and make time for ourselves, we can become that better version of ourselves.