One thing that all parents can agree on is that parenthood is sanctifying work. It is an absolute joy and blessing, but it also requires more from a person than we sometimes want to give. As my son’s second birthday approaches and we prepare to welcome another child this spring, I found myself contemplating how much my life has changed in such a short time. It occurred to me that as my husband and I navigate toddler tantrums and prepare for the sleepless newborn phase 2.0, we are changing, too. These are just a few of the ways I’ve seen parenthood change me for the better.
Not Sweating the Small Stuff
There’s something about having a child that changes your perspective on what truly matters in life. Trivial things that once felt really important to me have become less significant, and I can be more flexible if things don’t go my way. The old me would be really annoyed when plans got derailed or would stress out over small things. Now that I have a toddler, I’m accustomed to running late because he won’t put on pants or sweeping the floor for the 100th time because he’s spilled cheerios again. I am learning to be patient and go with the flow instead of letting inconveniences or a change in plans get the best of me.
Becoming More Present
I say “becoming” because this is definitely a work in progress. Distraction and busy-ness have become normal in our current culture; I often feel pulled in different directions by all the demands for my time and attention. While we can’t always avoid having a full plate, I am learning to turn off distractions and fully engage with the moment at hand as much as possible. I’ve seen first-hand how quickly children grow and change. My son is currently in a stage that is equal parts hilarious and adorable. I want to soak in the moments when he reaches up his arms and says “Mama, hold you!!” or giggles with glee while wrestling on the floor with his dad. Time is precious, and I’m learning to be present so I don’t let it slip by unappreciated.
Learning to Ask for Help
For most of my life, I’ve been a fairly self-sufficient person who could handle most of life’s demands on my own. Having a child has changed that because I simply can’t do everything myself, and half the time I don’t know what I’m doing. Toddlers are very needy humans and highly destructive when they escape your sight for more than 30 seconds. My husband and I have to tag-team to care for our son and make sure he doesn’t burn the house down.
I also need time to myself and with other adults, so I rely on family and other forms of childcare to watch my son when I need a break. Another way I’ve learned to ask for help is by seeking wisdom or advice from other moms when I need it. It’s humbling, but I’m learning that raising a child truly does take a “village,” and I am grateful to have one!
Growing in Gratitude
I’m not sure I can explain how or why, but I think parenthood is making me into a more grateful person. Even though they can be hard, I do find myself really treasuring these days and thanking God for the opportunity to be a mom. It is a gift, and every day with my son is a reminder of how much I’ve been given.
