Sometimes I wonder what life was like before we had children. Was it boring? Probably not, just a lot quieter. What I’ve found is that in the midst of carpool, late nights coming home from church, work events, and dinner on the go, is that it’s hard connecting with my spouse. I know I’m guilty of not prioritizing my spouse: either being lazy or unwilling to open up in conversation. Sometimes a text is just easier, am I right? I have thought a lot about finding simple ways to prioritize each other as husband and wife and making that my top priority.
Happily Ever After
My husband and I have been married for seven years, and I often hear people mention the seven year itch. I’ve never really understood what they say happens after seven years or what may make you more or less attracted to your spouse. I have found that we are closer than we have ever been, and that’s why we are so open with one another.
My life is not easy by any means, and marriage has been a roller coaster of a ride. I can say that it has been so encouraging to truly have someone that loves me with all he has and is my best friend.
Two Kids Later
Prioritizing my spouse is important to me for multiple reasons. One being, we didn’t have much time alone together after we got married. Four months after we married, I got pregnant with our first child. Less than two years later, we had our second child. Needless to say, two kids under two was a challenging stage of life.
I guess I would state that we didn’t get to enjoy very much of each other before we started a family. Do I regret it? Absolutely not, and I wouldn’t change a thing. Do I crave time alone now just the two of us? Of course I do! It’s nice to be able to actually “know” who you are married to.
Below are a few things I’ve found that have helped me prioritize my spouse, and they may help you as well.
Please don’t let this sound selfish, but this mama needs her time away. After children, a lot of things change–including your body. I’ve made my health a priority, as well as being active. I often look back at pictures of who I was before children and say who is that woman with your husband? I make sure to take time for myself, whether that’s a quick outdoor run, heading to the gym, or making a quick trip to Aldi to meal prep. Prioritizing yourself is also a nice refresh and boosts confidence as well!
Be intentional about dating
My spouse and I really try to go out on dates away from the house. We are fortunate to have family in the Birmingham area that help us often. We like to try new restaurants and unwind from the everyday grind by checking out new restaurants in Birmingham and really enjoying each other’s company. This is so good for us to get a few hours with no distractions . . . just the two of us.
Every year, we are intentional about going on a vacation together. We aren’t big gift people, but we both love to travel and go to new places. Our wedding anniversary falls around Christmas time, so this is when we try to take our vacation. We would rather make memories, travel to fun new places, and do it together.
Make It Happen
Your idea of “prioritize” may be different from mine, but I think one thing we can agree on is that we need to make it happen. Whether your kids are young or old, it all remains the same. Let’s encourage one another to remember our spouses in the midst of everyday life.
How do you and your spouse prioritize one another? I’d love to hear in the comments!