A Refocus onto Legacy in the New Year

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On the Enneagram test, I am a one wing three. As much as I hated to admit these results at first, they’re extremely accurate. For those of you unfamiliar with the Enneagram, this means that I’m an extreme perfectionist with a nice little side of achiever as well (my own personal definition). I’m always overly hard on myself and looking for areas of improvement. So, when I say that no one is more thrilled to set goals and attempt to achieve them in a year, you’ll find no truer statement. Please hear me when I say, there is nothing wrong with a desire to set goals or achieve things. Keep reading because I promise this is also not another post telling you how to achieve your New Year’s resolutions and be bikini-ready in time for spring break or to skip washing the dirty dishes in your sink in order to live in the moment.

For me, the new year is a time of personal reflection and analysis. I evaluate how I’m doing in life, areas I feel I could improve, and I make a plan of action accordingly. There’s honestly nothing special about doing this in the new year. It can be done at any time. Personally, I find it’s just the perfect opportunity to give myself a clean slate as we turn the calendar page over to a fresh new year, especially after such an intense time of waiting and reflection during the advent season.

A Refocus onto Legacy in the New Year

However, this year, I feel strongly about a new call to action — a refocus from resolutions to legacy.

What if instead of setting goals for eating more vegetables daily or reading more books in the year, I focused on what truly matters? Who is the woman I want my children to remember me as? What will they say about me after I’m gone? Will they discuss how much of a breastmilk stash I pumped or how much screen time I allowed them? How beautifully staged and decorated my house is? The number of likes on my Instagram or Facebook posts? How trendy of a dresser I was or how great I was at styling my hair? Whether I was a good enough SAHM or that I wasn’t as good as moms who worked?

Confession: every one of these things is a mom insecurity I possess in this crazy comparison game we all play with one another. So, what if for the next year, instead of feeding my discontent with comparison and a goal list, I focused on the person I want my children to remember me as and how I can become her? 

This New Year, I pray they will see me as a woman who finds contentment in the Lord first and foremost, rather than the approval of man. One who sacrifices and gives to others out of pure motives. A mother who demonstrates hospitality and warmth. May they never spend a moment questioning my love for them or feeling unwelcome around me. May they know that they are more valuable to me than a rectangular screen in my hand. May I embrace and rediscover moments of solitude and silence to recharge, rather than filling every moment with busyness. 

What kind of legacy do you aspire to leave your children?

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Stacey grew up in Birmingham and being the homebody she is, decided to stay and attend college at Samford University where she earned a degree in elementary education. She always dreamed of being a SAHM, but never imagined she'd be using her classroom management savvy to help raise BGG triplets. She met her husband, Jonathan, at the dear age of five, but it took them 20 more years and lots of different paths to realize they were meant for each other. A major planner at heart, Stacey is learning that some of the best things in life come in the unexpected. She and her husband currently live in Bluff Park and enjoy the unique challenges that their exciting family life brings. When she does get time to herself, Stacey enjoys exercise-especially Zumba, chai lattes, pedicures, a good book, and quality time with friends.