More Alike Than Different {Down Syndrome Awareness}

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October is Down Syndrome Awareness Month! My name is Jenny, and I am Mom to Aidan and Ella Mae by birth and to Jojo and Zee by the gift of adoption. Jojo and Zee both happen to have Down syndrome, and I am so excited to have the opportunity to tell you a little more about it.

Down Syndrome Awareness - More alike than different!
These children teach beautiful lessons every day.

The Basics

Down syndrome (Ds) is a genetic condition that occurs when a person has an extra copy of the 21st chromosome, which is why it is often referred to as T21. People with Down syndrome often have physical markers like an upward slant to the eye, smaller stature, a single deep crease across the center of the palm, and an adorable gap between their big and little toes. In addition, people with Down syndrome learn differently than others. I like to say they can do all the things that other people can do, it just might take them a little longer to get there. Some people with Ds also have health problems such as heart defects that can be moderate to severe.

Down syndrome is not a disease. It is not contagious and it is not something that people “suffer from”. It is simply a small part of who they are. People with Ds all have their own unique personalities, just like everyone else.

As a mother to two boys who are “chromosomally enhanced,” there are a few things I would love to share beyond the basics that will hopefully help you to better understand people who have Down syndrome as well as other different abilities!

The “R” Word

Let me tell you the truth. This word was a part of my vocabulary for a long time, but I have since learned how hurtful this word is to people who have intellectual disabilities as well as to their families. When the “R” word is used, it is typically synonymous with stupid, foolish, dumb, ridiculous, irritating, idiotic, etc. I could go into the history of how this word came about, why it is no longer acceptable, and I could go in to much more detail to explain why it is hurtful; but I have a word limit for this blog so I will boil it down to this: just don’t say it. It hurts people.

People-first Language

This is likely the first time many of you have heard this phrase, and I am so glad to be the one to introduce you to it! It is such a simple concept, but it can have a huge impact. You would likely never say, “She has an Alzheimer’s Dad” or, “This is my super-into-fitness friend Janet”. Instead you would say, “Her dad has Alzheimer’s” or, “This is my friend Janet. She loves to work out.” Always put the person BEFORE the descriptive term. So saying, “She has a Downs child” is not appropriate because my kids are not Down syndrome. They are people, who happen to have Down syndrome. Get it?

More Alike than Different

I call Jojo and Zee my twins because they are only seven months apart, but they really couldn’t be more different. Isn’t that funny? Two boys, who are almost the same age, who both have Down syndrome, and they are nothing alike.

Jojo has white skin and runs at full speed at all times. He is all boy and a true hot mess. He is in kindergarten, in a fully inclusive classroom, and is doing amazing! He has no health issues at all.

Zee has brown skin and is the sweetest soul you will ever meet. He is content almost all the time. He has so many health issues and has been through so much in his little life. I like to say that he is happy all the time because he is truly just glad to be alive. He is incredibly delayed because of the amount of time he spent in the hospital and on a ventilator, but he is making huge progress every day. He has a breathing tube and he is fed formula through a g-tube to protect his lungs.

My point in showing you their differences is simply this: not all people with Down syndrome are the same. Not all people are the same. We are all different and unique, and that is a good thing! But when you boil it all down to the basics, we are all people. We all have wants and needs and feelings and emotions. We are truly all more alike than we are different.

Because of Jojo and Zee, I have learned to see people with new eyes. I am just so very thankful for the beautiful lessons that they teach us every day. I am thankful that they are different because that is what makes them special. They teach us things about ourselves that we could have never learned any other way. They cause us to be more kind and more compassionate. They give us new eyes, so to speak, to see the overlooked, the vulnerable, the alone, and to reach out to them.

My encouragement to you is this: see people. See them first as people and then see how they are different. And learn that it is okay to be different. Teach that to your kids. Teach them not to stare at people who don’t look like them, but to say hi and ask questions if they have them.

We are all people.


Guest Blogger

Jenny Clark is a single mom of many living in Birmingham, Alabama. Her greatest life accomplishment is being a mom to Aidan, Ella Mae, Jojo, and Zee. As a single mom, she adopted Jojo and Zee, both of whom are “Chromosomally Enhanced”, as she likes to call it. The Lord has called her to the great work of fostering children who have various special and/or medical needs, and she has served over 14 children through the last few years. She blogs at www.jennymo.com.