You Won’t Miss That {But You Will Miss These Childhood Moments}

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A meme popped into my Insta feed that claimed we mommas would miss cleaning pee from the floor around the toilet. Somehow that was supposed to reassure those of us in the midst of childhood chaos, inspire hope for the future, remind us that childhood flies by. But telling you that you’ll miss cleaning pee is a big ole lie. You won’t miss that. I promise.

Never once with my grown children do I miss cleaning up after them, picking up dozens of cups, socks, and toys. Why would anyone miss the kind of stuff that makes daily life a grind? What you really need to know is that you’ll miss childhood moments that you never even knew you should cherish.

I miss the hugs.

You know the ones that you get spontaneously. The ones where your toddler clings to your legs as you introduce him to a friend. The ones where your tween quickly hugs you in the car after making sure no one is looking. The ones your teenager gives you minutes before telling you how stupid you are. When your connection is mostly by phone and text and you get to see them in person only rarely, you will miss the hugs.

I miss the giggles.

Baby belly laughs and teenage girl giggles are some of God’s greatest gifts. That completely unrestrained joy should be deposited into a bank for the days when the only laughs you hear are from the television. When they are laughing with their friends in dorm rooms and distant cities, you will miss hearing them laugh next to you on the couch or in the back seat of the car.

You will miss these childhood moments - giggles

I miss the energy.

A house with children has a certain level of buzzing energy. That energy comes from multiple people talking and moving and singing and engaging in life. A house becomes a calmer place when the children are gone, which I embrace, but I crave times when we lived in the chaos. When the silence feels weighty, I miss the creaking floors and muffled t.v. voices that energized our home.

I miss discoveries.

Those moments that stay with you: your baby rolls over for the first time, your soccer player scores her first goal, your teenage son waves goodbye as he pulls out from the driveway. Almost every day with your children brings new discoveries for them. Seeing the world through their fresh eyes is another one of God’s special gifts to parents. My days now play out almost seamlessly, and I miss wondering what new discovery each day will bring.

I miss my babies.

My babies, now 21 and 25, are busy with lives of their own. They are earning college degrees, making friends, having new experiences, all without me. And for every moment when I burst with pride seeing the adults they are becoming, I ache for one last cuddle, one more whiff of freshly bathed baby, one more bedtime story. I am grateful for the lives we lead today, but some days, I miss the little miracles I got to bring into the world.

Step away from the lie.

Believe me — you will not miss cleaning up after tiny humans. I absolutely love my house that remains clean for longer than an hour. I love that everything I want to use is right where it is supposed to be. I love walking through a room and not stooping to pick up someone else’s shoes. I love living this phase of cleaning up only after myself, but oh boy, some days I almost physically crave the sensory experience of a house and a life filled with young children.

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Chris L
Born in Wisconsin, Chris moved South with her family, first to Richmond, Virginia, and then to Birmingham when she was 12. She loves being a girl raised in the South, and her only remaining Midwestern traits are a love for the Packers and a fondness for bratwurst. In 2010, Chris reconnected with Christopher, a former Birmingham-Southern College classmate, after a random meeting in the cereal aisle at Publix. They married in 2011, not realizing that they were bringing together a perfect storm of teenage angst with their three children. Today, Chris is the center support that keeps the seesaw of her family balanced, leading a blended family of three young adults and enjoying an empty nest. Before the pandemic, most days were busy managing client relationships for a corporate event production company, but after six months of unemployment, she has become the parish administrator aka “the church lady” for her church. When she's not working, she loves reading a rich historical novel, volunteering with her sorority, and planning their next wine-tasting excursions.